mistress of the magical bus

Number 22 to Putney Common

    Number 22 to Putney Common

 


Suitors, Inc. - Paul Magrs


synopsis

The sexy Jane Fonda incarnation of Iris is blackmailed by Binky, warrior Queen of the Pussyworld, into kidnapping a million old ladies and shipping them to the Pussies.

 

annotation

P97 - "the dreadful Dalek invasion of Bedfordshire" - A reference to the Doctor's adventure The Dalek Invasion of Earth in 2164.

P97 - Romana - The Doctor's Time Lady assisant, at this point in her second incarnation.

P97 - "from bingo" - a very dull game involving numbered balls and a large coloured marker pen, played by overly competitive old women and people on holiday at Butlins. The Mecca chain is the home of British bingo playing.

P98 - "Robots? Rather early, wasn't it?" - By 1979, the closest most people had come to a genuine human-looking robot was the effete character of C3PO in the film Star Wars. However, the Robotics Institute at Carnegie Mellon University was founded in 1979.

P98 - "Cosmo" - Short for Cosmopolitan, a woman's magazine largely full of quizzes querying whether your lover is any good at oral sex and cures for cellulite.

P99 - "half fare for a robot dog!" - Romana should count herself lucky - many bus companies charge full fare for a large dog, even though it's not allowed to sit in a seat.

P99 - Pinot Noir - Pinot Noir is one of the oldest grape varieties to be cultivated for the purpose of making wine.

P99 - the Black Guardian - One of the six Guardians who work to maintain a cosmic balance in the Universe. The Doctor searched for the Key to Time for the White Guardian in his fourth incarnation and was the target of a Black Guardian plot during his fifth incarnation.

P100 - tagliatelle - Long, thin, flat strips of pasta about 1/4 inch wide, often served in a creamy sauce. The combination of red and white cloth, Pinot Noir and tagliatelle was pretty damn sophisticated in 1979.

P100 - UNIT -The United Nations Intelligence Taskforce.

P101 - Sarah - Sarah Jane Smith, one time travelling companion of the Doctor in his third and fourth incarnations, now working as an investigative journalist. She met Iris in her Beryl Reid incarnation in 'Old Flames'.

P101 - Harry - Harry Sullivan, naval officer, doctor and one time travelling companion of the fourth Doctor. Very old-fashioned, bordering on sexist, with great 70s sideburns.

P102 - "kybosh" - With a slightly different spelling (kibosh) this means a checking or restraining element, such as a big, scary and spangly gun.

P104 - "some fairy-tale princess" - In Hans Christian Anderson's tale 'The Red Shoes', the heroine wears dancing pumps which will not stop dancing.

P104 - styrofoam cup - Styrofoam is apparently 'the most recognizable form of foam polystyrene packaging', which leaves me none the wiser. Less scientifically it's that white polystyrene stuff that makes your coffee taste a bit funny and more likely to burn your nose or mouth whne purchased from a road side stand or, in Edinburgh at least, a converted Police Box.

P104 - Sutekh the Destroyer - An old enemy of the Doctor's from the adventure, The Pyramids of Mars. Trapped in a time eddy for ever by the Fourth Doctor.

P104 - Davros - Creator of the Daleks.

P104 - Omega - Time Lord hero turned villain, seen in the TV serials, The Three Doctors and Arc of Infinity. Lives in an anti-matter Universe, kept solid only by his own force of will. For an alternative view of Omega see Entertaining Mr O.

P104 - The Master - Moriarty to the Doctor's Sherlock Holmes.

P104 - Azal the Daemon - The Daemons were responsible for creating life on Earth (or so they claimed) and looked like the Devil himself. Destroyed by the Third Doctor in the story The Dameons.

P104 - Mohendri Solon - Mad scientist. As well as his primary appearance in the Fourth Doctor story Brain of Morbius, he also showed up in the incredibly awful and just a little bit disturbing Terrance Dicks novel, Warmonger.

P104 - Top Trumps- Best card game ever. In the seventies tended to feature planes, trains and sports personalities and sold to small children to play against their pals in the playground. Now tend to feature the cast of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and sell to men in their mid-thirties who then spend hours moaning online that Xander's Fear rating is way too high.

P106 - DoctorBot Two - The second DoctorBot is clearly based on the Third Doctor, which makes sense as the Doctors One and Two were old and scruffy, respectively.

P108 - Pussyworld - First mentioned in Iris' adventure Mad Dogs and Englishmen, Pussyworld is a world full of intelligent, quite evil cats. Self explanatory, really.

P110 - "components of the Key to Time" - The fourth Doctor and First Romana spent some time finding the six pieces of the Key to Time for the White Guardian, only to break it up about a minute after finding it.

P110 - Siamsese Cat - The type of cat featured in the Disney movie 'Lady and the Tramp' ("we are Siamese if you please"). Horrible looking things, frankly.

Fonda Iris